Recently at a Bible study, someone shared the struggles he’s facing and mentioned the upcoming test he has to face. I asked if he knows how to pass the small quizzes because before each test, there will be small quizzes. This is something I learn from experience and talking to my dad helps to clarify the lesson. The first test I took was the loss of my mom; this was the test of pain and I learned God’s power through the trial. The second test I took was my own sin; this was the test of shame and I learned God’s unconditional love through the forgiveness of sin. The first one was more painful, but the second one was more difficult because when shame got mixed with fear, guilt, and regret, there was no word to describe how awful it felt at that moment. At the lowest point of my life, when I had nowhere else to run, when shame overwhelmed my mind, when guilt put a chain around my heart, when I was in deep despair and fear, God reached out to me. He told me that He forgave me and loved me regardless. That love brought me back home! God is the ultimate source of love. “Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love” (1 John 4: 7-8).

The experience gained from these two tests taught me two lessons: 1) We need to CONSTANTLY GUARD OUR FAITH 2) Before the big test comes, there will be small quizzes along the way to help us learn the materials, equip us with the knowledge needed, and prepare us for the big moment when the test comes. We can’t predict when the test will come, what we will be tested on, and what price we have to pay to get to the next level of faith and understanding of God. Though we can’t predict, we can still prepare. I learn the secrets to prepare for the test: to remain humble with a servant heart and to set my priorities straight with God on top of the list. For example, now that I have the green card in my hands, do I boast about myself and the great work I have done to get myself to where I am today? Do I boast about my own strength, determination, and intelligence? No I dare not. Instead I boast about God, the one who delivered this gift into my hands, the one who fought this battle for me and with me. I’m nothing but a servant of His; only the master deserves the glory, not me. This is the opportunity for pride to come in and take my focus off God. When I’m standing on the top of the mountain, it’s easy to look around at the beautiful scenes and look inside to praise me. But I must not forget to always look upward to glorify and thank God. I can’t let my pride overshadow my faith. So after the green card came, I made two to-do lists, one for me and one for God, and these are the observations I see a couple days later:

My List:

• I see the green card as the victory of the battle
• I see my future with Northwestern and Harvard
• I chase after my American dream
• My list includes little things like getting a new driver license (only immigrants will get this one), buying new sneakers
• My list uses me as the center
• I want to run as fast as I can toward all my dreams that were put on hold during this process

His List:

• He sees spiritual growth as the important matter of faith
• He sees His master plan for my life, something I honestly know not of
• He looks at my heart and wants me to have a humble servant heart
• His list includes heavy to-dos like reconciling with relatives to resolve problems in the past
• His list revolves around Him
• He wants me to glorify Him by loving and serving others as I love and serve Him first

So these observations help to put me on my toes to constantly guard my faith and make sure I set my priorities right. For instance, if after the green card, I spend more time studying the GRE than the Bible, that means I put Harvard above God. Typically, when that happens, I will be distracted and loosen up my faith. I learn that when we are weak and distracted from God, Satan will grab that opportunity (he’s constantly watching us) to start his schemes of attacks. When that happens, if we’re not ready and the test comes (or even the small quiz), we will fail. I almost failed my second test when I came so close to choose living in sin over God, so I don’t ever want to be unprepared for the test again. And I’m not going to let my pride lead me into destruction again. Therefore, I will put God first. I will boast Him on the mountains and in the valleys. Right now I’m standing on the top of the mountain, so I boast God and give Him all of the credit.

The Bible is very clear about the consequences of pride. “But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: ‘God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble'” (James 4:6). The story of Nebuchadnezzar in the Old Testament should make a good warning for us about pride.

“Twelve months later, as the king was walking on the roof of the royal palace of Babylon, he said, ‘Is not this the great Babylon I have built as the royal residence, by my mighty power and for the glory of my majesty?’ Even as the words were on his lips, a voice came from heaven, ‘This is what is decreed for you, King Nebuchadnezzar: Your royal authority has been taken from you. You will be driven away from people and will live with the wild animals; you will eat grass like the ox. Seven times will pass by for you until you acknowledge that the Most High is sovereign over all kingdoms on earth and gives them to anyone he wishes.’ Immediately what had been said about Nebuchadnezzar was fulfilled. He was driven away from people and ate grass like the ox. His body was drenched with the dew of heaven until his hair grew like the feathers of an eagle and his nails like the claws of a bird” (Daniel 4: 28-33). This is the consequence of pride.

“At the end of that time, I, Nebuchadnezzar, raised my eyes toward heaven, and my sanity was restore. Then I praised the Most High; I honored and glorified him who lives forever. His dominion is an eternal dominion; his kingdom endures from generation to generation. All the peoples of the earth are regarded as nothing. He does as he pleases with the powers of heaven and the peoples of the earth. No one can hold back his hand or say to him: ‘What have you done?’ At the same time that my sanity was restore, my honor and splendor were returned to me for the glory of my kingdom. My advisers and nobles sought me out, and I was restored on my throne and became even greater than before. Now I , Nebuchadnezzar, praise and exalt and glorify the King of heaven, because everything he does is right and all his ways are just. And those who walk in pride he is able to humble” (Daniel 4: 34-37). This is the reward for humility.

As Scripture has said God is sovereign over all things, on earth and in heaven. And he clearly personally demonstrated His sovereignty over my life during this immigration process. The world said it would take 6-8 months for the PERM, God did it in 2 months. The world said it would take 15 days for the employer approval; God did it in less than a week. The world said it would take 2 months for the fingerprint, God did it in 10 days.  The world said the last step would take 6-12 months; God did it in 4 months. The world said it would take 3 weeks to mail the actual green card, God did it in 4 days. So if I do the math right, the world was wrong every time because God has always been in control since the beginning and throughout the entire process. I was well protected under His sovereign hands. Even better not only that He took care of all of the big steps with immigration, He cared enough to give me the little gifts that warmed my heart; so many surprises that I didn’t even ask for. About two months before the green card came, God gave me the opportunity to visit NYC and take photos in front of the Statue of Liberty. I have waited 9 years in America to take these photos since NYC and the Statue of Liberty represented America for me when I was in Vietnam; something I could only see from afar but could never touch. But of course with God’s help, things changed! Then he brought me back to Saint Louis, where our journey began, where we met for the very first time: first time at church, first time going on church retreat, first time hanging out with Christians, first time hearing about Jesus, etc. So many memories….

Throughout this immigration process, there were many times I was so scared, but I lifted my eyes up to heaven to constantly remind myself the Lord is the King of heavens and earth; His sovereignty rules over all; no man, no authority, no power on earth can compare to Him or change His plans in my life. When I am weak, He is strong for me. “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Corinthians 12: 9-10). After the green card came, I had so many celebrations with many great people, and next week we will have a big party to celebrate with the people that were there with me at different stages of the process. Some saw it since the beginning (my dad), some only saw the finish line. But I’m thankful for all of these amazing brothers and sisters in Christ that God has put in my life. I learn that as we pursue our dreams, we can’t fly solo; we need one another for help, encouragement, and guidance. Each person needs a Paul to seek wisdom and guidance, a Luke for companionship side by side, and a Timothy to encourage and mentor. I’m thankful that I have all three in my life. And of course I thank my God and boast Him for it. To God be the glory!